Picking a film for two people, not one
The overlap is smaller than you think
Most date-night failures are a compromise nobody wanted: a film neither person would have chosen alone, picked because it offended neither taste. It is safer to take turns choosing properly. A film one of you loves and the other tolerates beats a film you both mildly endure, because at least somebody is enjoying themselves and the other gets to see why.
Genuine shared favourites do exist, but they are rarer than the phrase "date night" implies, and hunting for one every week is how you end up scrolling for forty minutes.
Leave room to talk
Films that demand total silence are a strange choice for an evening whose purpose is partly conversation. The best date films have a rhythm with gaps in it — a moment you can turn to each other during, an ending that raises a question worth answering out loud.
It is also why very long films are a weaker choice than their quality suggests. Two hours forty leaves nothing after the credits except going to bed.
Decide before you sit down
The single biggest improvement available here is choosing earlier in the day. Browsing together at nine in the evening is its own small argument, and by the time you agree, half the goodwill has been spent.
Use this list to pick two candidates in advance and let the other person choose between them. It takes thirty seconds and removes the entire problem.